Failure. It’s hard to talk about.

Failure. It’s hard to talk about.  Especially when we’re in our twenties and most of us haven’t achieved much yet that we are “proud” of, our failures can hang over our heads or hide in the corners of our minds, convincing us that everyone else can see them too. In business, failure is part of the game. I have failed over and over again, in both my personal and professional life, and that’s exactly what gives me the confidence and grit that I have today.

Here are some of my biggest “failures” to date:

1. I gave up on my first business (Sorry I Party).

2. I never graduated college. I had one semester left. ONE. A 3.8 GPA. And my boyfriend at the time was diagnosed with cancer. So I dropped all my classes with the intention of resuming in the spring… except that didn’t happen. My career was already advancing at that point and I felt that refocusing on school would be a step back. So I didn’t do it, and I don’t regret it. But it’s definitely something I get self-conscious about. It’s definitely something I believe that I will be judged for. And I’m learning not the care- because, at the end of the day, I learned what I needed to and I didn’t let society pressure me into doing what’s expected.

3. I chose work over family for three years because I believed someone when they told me that I had to. Que confession #2. Once my career started developing, I was told constantly that the next years of my life were about “sacrifice”. Which meant birthdays. Christmas. Phone calls home. All of it. I haven’t spent Christmas- or any real holiday- with my family since I was 21- over THREE years ago- how insane is that? Going into 2018, I committed to changing that. To rebuild those relationships and make family a priority again. And I have- just as much as I have committed to NEVER putting that kind of pressure on anyone that I work with.

4. I spent four days in the psych ward of a hospital. It was the worst four days of my life at the time but four of the best days for me in the long run. It is still hard for me to talk about, but for anyone out there who struggles with depression or anxiety or overworking yourself, I’ve been there and I’m here if you need to talk.

So there you have it! Some of the things that I’m so tempted to be ashamed of, but am slowly starting to accept as part of my story. And anyways, at the end of the day, it isn’t our failures that define us, but what we do in spite of them, right?